Wrestling with God

Greetings,

Well I’m finally through! I can no longer do it… I can no longer wrestle with God. You see for years now I’ve been on the outside looking in. From the time I was 12 years of age when my friends and I would go see the movie Jesus Christ Superstar, I’ve known what my calling in life was, but thanks to the lie, I’ve followed through with my calling till now. I do have one huge sin that I have to confess to though. You see, for most of my life I have allowed Satan to convince me that I was not good enough to be a pastor/teacher. So I’ve always been on the outside looking in. Even though I know the truth, that Christ paid the price for my sins, I still felt the “not worthy” thing (I know... I know... none of us are worthy). But over the last couple of years, the tugging at my heart, the desires of my heart to serve God have all been magnified 100 times over. The best way to describe the last couple of years has been “I’ve been wrestling with God”. I’ll tell you what; you’ll truly know when you are wrestling with Him… I’ve never been so tired emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically. I had to surrender all, He will not stop, and He is relentless in His pursuit. God will never force you to do something, but He is sure to make His will known.

I already have a website (www.anchorholdsministries.org) from where I share things about Christ and what He expects from us. My site also helps promote other Christian sites and followers of Christ and the ministries they have. After some time of serious prayer I will start a small home bible study group. From there, that is all up to the Lord.

One of the reasons I have been so reluctant all these years is I didn’t think anyone would come to a church that I started. I’ve felt for years now that the true message Christ taught has been watered down. But there is a movement in the Spirit building and more and more people are hungry for the real truth. It is all coming together in God’s timeline.

Please keep me in your prayers and the direction God would have me go. May God bless and keep you always.
Tim